Sit With Happiness

What’s a common misconception people have about happiness?

As Americans, we have grown up with the catchy phrase, “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness..” from the Constitution. We are entitled to happiness, so we pursue happiness, and we can attain happiness, at least for a time.  But being happy is not a state of mind that can be maintained.

Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble” – he doesn’t say you may have trouble, he says you will. Every time trouble comes, our happiness flees. Trouble comes in many forms, but it comes for us all, sometimes in the form of sickness, loss of a job, heartbreak, or death, robbing us of our joy, peace and happiness.

I used to think that the secret to happiness was a grateful heart. I don’t believe that anymore. Yes, gratitude is important and beautiful but it isn’t the secret to happiness. There is no secret.

Someone much more intelligent than me said it all.

Kahlil Gibran
1883 –1931

On Joy and Sorrow

“Then a woman said, Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow.
And he answered:
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter’s oven?
And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, “Joy is greater than sorrow,” and others say, “Nay, sorrow is the greater.”
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.
Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.
When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.”

We are told we must sit with our sorrows and griefs. We can’t escape the pain. I believe we must also sit with our happiness.

When our days are happy, when a fleeting joy touches our heart, we need to stop and sit with our happiness. It will likely only be a few moments of bliss, so stop whatever you’re doing and live in that moment. Enjoy it, relish it, try to immortalize the moment so it can be recalled. And try to appreciate the moments you may take for granted, the small moments of happiness that are sprinkled upon us, like enjoying a delicious meal, receiving a warm hug or a sweet smile, feeling a real connection with another person, or basking in the beauty of a gorgeous sunset.