Grief Journey Day + 135

We made it through Christmas without Billy. We did everything exactly as we have over the years, and our familiar traditions seemed to bring some comfort to everyone. Joanna, Nick and Luna came down from Chicago. Joseph, Trisha and Nora came down from Lafayette. Jason and Janice and family came over from Clay City. We had a Christmas Eve games night with a lot of laughter. On Christmas Day I prepared all our family’s traditional foods, like turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, chicken & noodles and mashed potatoes, cranberry relish and desserts. After we had dinner, it was the typical chaotic present exchange. There are so many of us and so many presents that it takes quite a while to open them all, and I love to hear the shouts of excitement from the children and their calls of “thank you!” across the room. We were all blessed to be together this Christmas and it really felt like a treasured gift we didn’t take for granted. We didn’t have to say how much we missed Billy, the air was thick with our grief. But my house was bright with joy, too, and love.

My children lost their rock, their compass, I lost my love. But we’re still a family, strong together and here for each other, and that truth was so clear this Christmas. The first Christmas in my journey of life without my husband has now passed. I feel blessed and full of love and gratitude, and that amazes me. I feel closer to my God and Savior, and that strengthens me. May God richly bless you in the New Year ❤️