Our family needs a rest, a break from sickness and anxiety. Joanna was readmitted to the hospital yesterday with severe pre-eclampsia. Her blood pressure was at a critical level when she and her husband got to the ER. Blood pressure medicine was administered via IV and they started a 24 hour magnesium drip to prevent seizures. Thank God, she is alright and the treatments are working. If they can get her dosage of blood pressure medicine correct, she may be discharged again tomorrow.
Luna is improving. She’s still receiving oxygen and assistance with breathing and she’s on medication to prevent seizures. She will be on anti-seizure medication for at least a month. Then, hopefully, she can be weaned off of it. Luna is still fed with a feeding tube, but she will be able to nurse once she can breathe on her own. Joanna has been so faithful to pump despite all her problems and challenges.
I have been up here in Chicago with them for 10 days. It’s not like I could run home, I live 5 hours away. Thankfully, I was able to work remotely part of the time, but I need to get back home, get back to the office, check on my house and go through my mail. I didn’t want to leave until I was certain everyone was going to be okay. And I still feel like I don’t have that assurance. And it’s a very hard decision to go back home. I really wish that Billy were here so that we could discuss it together and make a decision. But it’s just me. It’s just up to me. I hate being without him. I hate that he wasn’t here to be beside me while the whole world was split wide open. I had to be strong, I had to be there for my daughter. And I was. I imagine that when I get home I’ll probably spend a lot of time processing everything that happened and let my emotions run free reign. I hate that I cry at the weirdest times.
But I am grateful that my daughter is alive, and that my granddaughter is going to be okay eventually. I am grateful that I have a daughter that is so strong. I am so proud of her. I wish Billy were here to see how incredible she is. But he is not, and November is almost here, and I’m looking at 73 days without him so far.
A Little Bit of Everything, With Love 